Hey, friend!

Well, instead of talking about my brain not working the way I want it to, today we're talking about my body not working the way I want it to. Just switching things up!

I've had a shoulder impingement—where your rotator cuff is pinched between, or rubs on, shoulder bones—for about four years. I recently started working with a new fitness coach and we were trying to very, very carefully exercise the muscles around that area to strength them. But... not carefully enough, it turns out. Last week my rotator cuff tore, and I was in... a lot of pain.

The physical therapist I talked to asked me where my pain was, on a scale from 1 to 10, and I just guessed. But I knew there was a true pain scale that had real meaning, so I looked it up when I got home, and what I learned was very interesting.

What was most helpful to me are the sections below. Minor, moderate, severe. And, more importantly, the descriptions of how much it impacts your daily life.

Minor pain: This is is how I tend to think about chronic pain. Nagging, annoying, but can be managed psychologically and with tools and supports and medicine.

Moderate pain: Patient unable to adapt pain. Your life has to significantly change as a result of this pain.

Severe pain: This is disabling. And this is terrifying.

I think I tend to assume that there aren't really any major issues that can happen to our bodies that can't, in the long term, end up in either "no pain" or "minor pain." But... even chronic minor pain must make such a huge different in someone's day-to-day life. It's like how kids who don't have food or housing stability have a harder time at school than those who do; I imagine folks with chronic pain of any sort just have so many more barriers to overcome.

But the biggest and wildest thing for me out of this was realizing that you could live a lifetime with moderate or even potentially severe pain. I can't even imagine. I've spent a few days this week at moderate pain, and one morning it was severe, and I was relatively useless. There are still piles of unfolded laundry laying around my house as a result of this. What would it be like if this was every week?

Anyway. All I have to offer today is this acknowledgement that there are people around us experiencing physical pain to a degree we can't even comprehend, and I'm very glad for this experience making it more real to me. Woof.

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Been cutting my own hair (medium high bald fade) since the beginning of the pandemic & gotten pretty good at it. I tore my rotator cuff last week & my hair was overdue for a cut. I have a date & a video shoot this week so I decide to try to cut my own hair with only 1 hand. (Tweet)(Thread)
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That's it for now!

Until next time...

Your friend,
Matt Stauffer